Jeff Foxworthy's "You might be a redneck if. . ." lines were funny. Sadly, these aren't:
I might not be a patriot if I think the Constitution is the greatest work in political history, but don't read it.
I might not be a patriot if I think that every time a president declares war I should salute the flag and send in my sons and daughters without question. (Hint: The Constitution doesn't authorize presidents to declare war.)
I might not be a patriot if I think my church should be the official American church.
I might not be a patriot if I think a person can't be a patriot and a Muslim, too.
I might not be a patriot if I think I owe my loyalty only to elected leaders from my chosen political party.
I might not be a patriot if I think that anyone who protests an American president's actions is unpatriotic.
I might not be a patriot if I think that my needs outweigh those of any other citizen of the world.
I might not be a patriot if I think anyone of any race other than mine is automatically inferior to me.
I might not be a patriot if I won't listen to or can't tolerate others' opinions.
I might not be a patriot if I'd rather accept a corrupt status quo than agitate for change.
I might not be a patriot if I am willing to support uncontrolled growth of ruthless corporate power instead of supporting regulation of that power. (Hint: Corporations aren't people.)
I might not be a patriot if I think that corporate well-being outweighs the well-being of the people.
I might not be a patriot if I support my government right or wrong.
I might not be a patriot if I think that the deaths of hundreds of thousands of civilians are justified as long as it keeps the U.S. at the top of the food (or oil) chain.
I might not be a patriot if I think that Karl Rove's tactics represent the pinnacle of American political thought.
I might not be a patriot if I think that no one has the right to reject my opinions.
I might not be a patriot if I think that ridiculing or belittling those with whom I disagree is a valid method of rejecting their views.
I might not be a patriot if I think that the country should be run by only one political party.
I might not be a patriot if watching news shows that support my views is more important to me than analytical, investigative reporting.
I might not be a patriot if I think that my freedom can be secured at the expense of anyone else's.
I might not be a patriot if I think we have no need for a strong national defense.
I might not be a patriot if I'm willing to sacrifice any of my freedom in exchange for security or safety.